Some fundamental concepts I reference in my coaching.

Below the line is not only human, it is vital to learning and growing.

Locating yourself comes from observation NOT assessment, judgment, or diagnosis of yourself (or others).

Knowing your location is data to inform, not a directive to act from.

Striving to live above the line is dead people’s goals.

The language you speak and hear is a mirror of your location.

Is the resistance you are experiencing because of what you are doing or how you are doing it?

Is your resistance to what you are experiencing because of what is happening or how it is happening?

Is the purpose clear? Not simply what needs to occur but why?

Is this a demand or a request?

Recycling conversations is a sure indicator that the context is in question.

Can you take a picture of it? If not, it’s a story.

Stories are not always untrue, but we need to hold them lightly until we validate them with the source.

We cannot stop ourselves from making stories, the work is to notice them and treat them as such.

Observations are facts. Assessments, judgments, and diagnosis are the stories we tell ourselves.

As humans, we spend 95% of our time responding from below the line. As Victim, Villain, and/or Hero. Often all three.

Understanding the presence roles of each begins the invitation to shift.

How are you conspiring in your drama?

What are the payoffs that keep you there?

What is in your control and what is not?

What is familiar about this drama?

What are you saying or hearing that is contributing to this drama?

What is this person or situation here to teach you?

What feelings are triggering in you?

What unmet needs are being triggered?

What needs to be said that has not been said?

Is this an obstacle to be overcome or growth waiting to happen?

What core values are triggered?

Is this happening to you or for you?